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Posts Tagged ‘Co-sleeping’

In Her Own Bed

Sleeping Angels

Since the day our little Bean was born, we’ve been practicing a form of co-sleeping known as bedsharing, something that has been a sweet, sweet bonding experience – especially since I’ve returned to work full-time.

We hadn’t set any expectations for this practice to end, but simply waited on a time that seemed right.

This bittersweet time has now (sort of) come for us.

It started a few weeks back as Bean approached the 18-month mark. She sleeps between my husband and I on our queen size bed, which has generally provided enough space for all involved, until she decided to start taking a little more than her fair share!

How could a tiny toddler take up so much space??

And yet one or both of us (my husband and I) would all too frequently find ourselves hanging on to the side of the bed by a hair, curled up in a bottom corner, or simply relegated to the couch or guest bed when we couldn’t take it any longer.

This grew progressively worse, to the point where for several nights in a row I was being pushed, kicked and prodded by a little Bean who was no longer seeming to get the concept of bed ‘sharing’ and seemed all too consumed with the idea of bed ‘hogging’.

I don’t mind admitting – I lost my patience with this idea pretty darn quickly. Read the rest of this entry »

Co-Sleeping Barriers – What’s Stopping You?

Welcome to the Safe Cosleeping Blog Carnival

This post was written for inclusion in the Safe Cosleeping Blog Carnival hosted by Monkey Butt Junction . Our bloggers have written on so many different aspects of cosleeping. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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English: A sleeping male baby with his arm ext...

Image via Wikipedia

Bean is sleeping upstairs right now in the middle of our queen size bed. It’s fairly chilly in our room so she’s got a few layers on, along with a halo sleep sack we found awhile back on Babysteals that helps keep her toesies warm.

In a few hours we’ll be joining her, as we have for the past 15 months, sharing a family bed.

I never imagined what a meaningful effect bedsharing would have on our family before Bean came along. I gain so much peace of mind from having her right there next to me where I know she is OK and can respond immediately if she is not.

I know I get a lot more sleep – she’s always been one to wake relatively often during the night to eat – and I literally can hardly imagine actually getting out of bed and going to another room to feed her. Having her right there makes that part of parenting much easier!

The husband gains a lot from it – he had to return to work basically right away after she was born, while I had her most days every day for her entire first year. Sharing a bed was a way for him to maintain a very strong bond with her for more hours of the day than he might normally get. Now that I’ve returned to work, I feel the strength of that bond as well.

In many ways for me, bedsharing has become a cornerstone of the trust my daughter has for me. She knows that I will always be there for her – no matter what time of the day – especially when she is at her most vulnerable. The dark doesn’t matter because mommy and daddy are always right there next to her. There are many ways to gift one’s child with that trust – and it is a powerful and much to be desired gift for them to have. I am thankful that we have found such a way of giving it to her.

I could go on and on about the benefits we’ve found in our co-sleeping arrangement, along with the other benefits that studies have shown will last throughout her lifetime.

But what I want to touch on here is the fact that I came very close to missing out on all of this, for two reasons. Read the rest of this entry »

Redemptive Moments

Baby Sleeping

Image by sean_mcgee via Flickr

Our family shares a bed, and Bean normally sleeps between the two of us.

The husband almost always goes to bed before I do, and I often go up there to find Bean snuggled up against him with the exact same sleep face as her daddy.

But last night when I went up, I found her asleep with her head on my pillow. It was the cutest thing ever (I really wish I had a picture)!

I actually had to wake the husband up to get him to look; I don’t really think his barely opened eyes and grunt showed appropriate appreciation of the cuteness, but what can you do?

(Of course, she normally does not sleep with a pillow and mine actually usually isn’t even there until I grab it from the floor or the end of the bed when I go to sleep.) Read the rest of this entry »

My Dream Daycare…

Child 1

Image by Tony Trần via Flickr

So this morning as I was walking along, thinking about how I have to go back to work in less than 3 months :(, I was daydreaming about opening a home daycare.

I actually strongly considered the possibility (mainly so I could stay home with the Bean) but unfortunately when most people see giant rottweiler + small child, they don’t think, “Aww, how sweet.”

In fact, it’s usually more along the lines of, “Aren’t you afraid that dog is going to maul your child?

Luther, of course, is highly saddened by these thoughts…as nobody seems to like him sometimes. He knows we love him though! And he is amazing with the Bean…

Anyway, I’m getting off track.

So when I imagine my likely never to exist home daycare, I think about what I would want from the perfect daycare. Thus, the following would be my ad: Read the rest of this entry »

Dealing With Sleep Frustrations…

A child sleeping.

Image via Wikipedia

I don’t have a ton of inspiration today…my brain is foggy, my body is dragging and my eyes are drooping…

If you haven’t already guessed it, the Bean decided last night was the night for a 1:00AM party!

As much as we like to complain sometimes, I will fully admit that sleep has not really been a nightmare for us as I know it has been with many parents. Bean did not take long to figure out the difference between night and day. We co-sleep, so I never have to drag my butt out of bed to tend to her needs.

We even had a handful of nights around 3-5 months that she slept through the entire night!

For awhile I thought I had that wonderful, unattainable dream baby that made all my other parent friends hate me. But then she settled into a routine of waking 2-3 times/night to eat, and I started to realize that I actually wanted her to be doing that - after reading more and coming to a better understanding that at this young age, most babies still need to get some food in their bellies through the nightime hours!

Over the past few months she’s been on a fairly regular schedule (with occasional exceptions) – waking between 10 and 11, and again between 3-4. She will eat and then go right back to sleep. She’s then up with daddy between 6-7; I get up to make breakfast not long after that, but I usually get at least a half hour of having the bed to myself. I like to call it my best sleep of the night!

But the past few nights…ooh boy! Read the rest of this entry »

Love Letter for a Bean – April 2011

Love Letters for a Bean(These posts are inspired by Touchstonez & SausageMama – if you blog and you’re interested in posting a monthly letter to your kiddos, you can grab the badge to join in here).

Dear Bean,

I think I must be confused. I find it very hard to accept that you are 8 months old today. Are you sure it’s not 7 months? That I didn’t mix up the dates?

Because Little Miss – you are growing way too fast!

It’s such sadness and joy together that sometimes I can hardly bear it…you’re doing new things every day and you feel bigger and more heavy when I hold you…it’s getting harder to imagine how tiny you were when you made your appearance 8 months ago. I look at pictures and I’m astounded to see the changes that have come so fast.

As always, all you want to do is move…it’s rare to see you sitting still for more than 5 minutes. You’ve been crawling, pulling yourself up to stand…and I see you with that gleam of desire in your eye whenever you see children walking. I feel you’re thinking, “I WILL make that happen just as soon as I’m able!

You are a little girl who is going places! Read the rest of this entry »

Spring is in the Air…A Whole New Season With the Bean!

Grass

Image by iantmcfarland via Flickr

March 1st…It’s sunny outside, the snow is almost all gone…spring is in the air!

I cannot believe that the Bean is already in her 6th month of being here with me…what a crazy, amazing time this has been!

I’ve learned, I think, more than I ever have in my life. I’ve made a great new friend thanks to the proximity of our baby’s birthdays (one day apart – love to Michelle and the Little! :) ) I’ve become closer to friends who already have children, more understanding of my own parents, and more sympathetic when it comes to other people’s kids.

I’ve changed my own habits…eating healthier, being more active, paying more attention to whether the cleaning and personal care products I use are toxic.

I’ve found new definitions for myself:

  • Mother
  • Attachment Parent
  • Co-sleeper
  • Baby-wearer
  • Cloth diaper mama
  • Intactivist
  • Crunchy
  • Amazing woman who’s body has grown a baby, pushed her out, and continues to hold, comfort and care for her nearly all the hours of the day. :)

Wow…I mean, check me out! Read the rest of this entry »

Our Family Bed

Sleeping baby seen from crib height, behind it...

Image via Wikipedia

There is nothing I love more than coming up to bed to find the Bean snuggled up next to Daddy, both of them with the same peaceful sleeping expressions. I always have to gaze at that beautiful picture for a few minutes before turning out the night light above our bed.

Before the Bean came along, I never even considered co-sleeping – in fact, I liked to talk about how she would be in her own room from day one (oh how little I knew…).

By the time she was ready to get here, I had decided to compromise with a bassinet next to my bed. But when she finally came along, she was just so tiny! She looked lonely and small in that big bassinet, and I just wanted her next to me anyway, so into the bed she came…and she’s been there ever since.

Now, I know that co-sleeping is not for everyone. Some parents don’t like it; some babies don’t like it – it’s definitely something that only you will know if it is right for you. But I have been excited to learn that there are a lot of benefits of co-sleeping, particularly when we still run into a lot of objections when we try to explain our family bed.

#1 – Aren’t you afraid you’ll roll over on the baby? Read the rest of this entry »

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